Question for people to answer in your guestbook.
The Virgin Complex
I must first admit that I no longer fall under the category of virgin, however, before you grow alarmed mother, I also do not fall under the category of sexually active. Yes, there is a NuvaRing packet in my oak wood medicine cabinet to the left of a grimy porcelain sink. But rest assured, its sole purpose is the regulation of Mother Natures cruelest monthly bodily function and not the incapacitation of my wombs ability to produce a fetus.
Now to those of you stumbling upon a sexual article in hopes of hearing someone’s dirty details let me inform you that it is not my intention to reveal the story of my lost v-card. Furthermore, this article does not promote sex.
Now if you’re still an interested reader…
Tonight I sat on a couch, not new, not old, tan, no obvious stains to disgust and trigger thoughts of what happened here, just a couch. To the right of me sat a boy aspiring to be a DJ, currently engrossed in creating a remix for a competition. And, after multiple hours of staring at slideshows and writing notes verbatim on my tragically uninteresting criminal justice class, I decided to put down my blue BIC pen and pick up a conversation.
Let me describe him to you. He’s a freshman boy, key word in this sentence being boy and not freshman. His ivory cheeks are speckled with a hint of acne and his voice is complicated by a slight stutter. And although he is talented, he is lost, a little slow, and somewhat easily manipulated, as demonstrated by a dare to put ice down his pants for five minutes an hour prior.
I began a conversation with him not because I was necessarily interested in his hobbies or even him for the matter. I talked to him because I wanted him to know what it was like to have someone to talk to who wasn’t going to take advantage of him. Everyone deserves someone who isn’t looking for something.
The conversation began like most with a set of questions and answers. However, and much to my surprise, it was quite easy to converse with him.
He showed me his latest remix, or the first 25 seconds of it. Looked up synchronized lights he was hoping to get for a venue he was hoping to lease for a disco night he was hoping to plan. He shared with me how his ice in the pants friends had recently placed stripper lips tattoos on their asses and how his roommate, who had previously gone to high school with me, was such a germaphobe that he was able to down a full bottle of Germ-Ex a week on doorknobs and bed frames.
It was after these somewhat entertaining topics that he brought up how he was unfortunately and regrettably a virgin looking for some tail. And that’s what I don’t understand.
Why is it that when people are virgins they feel like their less? Why is it that people look for sex, not for love, but for bragging rights? And why is it that this boy, key word from earlier, is listening to boys with lips tattooed on their asses for life advice?
From my perspective, I have never seen anything wrong with being a virgin. I have honestly thought many times to myself that college is composed of three types of men: the sexually active, the walking STD’s, and the liars. Notice that good guys, virgins, and even driven students weren’t included.
But truth be told, I would love for my view of college kids to be one comprised of men who didn’t care whether they were virgins or not, men whom you could sit down and have a normal conversation with, men who were more interested in their futures than the “typical” freshman girls butt and bust.
Dear DJ & The Virgins,
There is nothing wrong with being a virgin. We women are honestly interested in the way your brain works, the type of personality you have, the conversations you hold, and the way you take care of yourself because, whether we readily admit it or not, looks do matter. However, the number of people who you’ve “hooked up” with or the amount of ass you’ve tapped so far your freshman year is something only your boys want to hear about. It doesn’t impress us it disgusts us.
P.S. As jealous creatures to begin with, we don’t like the idea of having to compare ourselves to the list of girls you want to add us to.
P.P.S. Life only hands you so many cards, please don’t casually throw them away.
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